Welcome to Star Control, Captain! You’re here because you’ve shown exemplary service, aced all your flight exams, and – most importantly – passed all the sanity tests. Humanity has learned that it is not alone in the universe and that we are hopelessly outmatched by alien civilizations seeking to destroy us. You have been selected to command Earth’s first and only interstellar starship to accomplish this – try not to break it. It was expensive.
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